Monday, May 9, 2011

The best you can do.

We all strive for perfection. Okay well at least most of the people I know. And the majority of us beat ourselves up for not achieving this so called perfection. I know. I have lived my life trying to be some kind of perfect I can't even describe. It is wonderful to want to be our best selves. But life is certainly a workout. Every day we wake up and have a chance to start again. Isn't that beautiful? No matter how hard your day may be, you have the chance to go to sleep and wake up and try again.
My life may be intense, but I don't wake up feeling like something is missing. Bedtime tends to be difficult. I want the boys in bed by 8pm, because at 8:30pm I turn into a pumpkin. Really. Or maybe just a really cranky Mommy. And each day I try again. It kills me that bedtime is not peaceful. But I am working on it. Last year my son's teacher gave me some wonderful advice, "you can only do the best you can do." Stop judging. Just do. All I can do is set the intention and do my best. Maybe the outcome does not fit into my picture or someone else's. There is always an opportunity to learn and we have the freedom to choose to work towards being better.  And even more importantly to let go of our illusion of perfection and just do the best you can.
I am learning how important it is to take risks, especially as a parent. I need to risk my children being angry with me. I need to speak my truth and set boundaries, so they will do the same.
In terms of taking risks, children really need room to explore. Waldorf Education teaches young children to use needles to sew and knives to carve. They light matches. Inuits give small children knives. As fearful as I may be I have tried to explore expanding our safety boundaries in order to teach my children responsibility.
I thought this talk by Gever Tulley from TED was really interesting...Playing with controlled fire, helping you do the best you can do!

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