Friday, May 27, 2011

Summer Starts to Bloom

Our lives have been very full as of late. Not leaving much time for writing. In two months we will hit our 1 year anniversary of the big move. So many changes. But then life is always changing, always evolving. I am thankful for having the opportunity to be with my boys. To be the primary caregiver. I longed for it with all my being and I can honestly say, that a year ago it did not seem like I would ever be here. I would cry when others talked about being home with their children, as I clocked in a 15 hour day. Now I am there when they wake, when they sleep. When they fall, when they succeed.
I have become a much better role model, by finding my boundaries and owning myself. Every day is a work in progress, but it is getting there.

Things that really solidified this week -
Daily Rhythm helps make my children more flexible.
I can forgive myself and my children if we fall off the rhythm band wagon.
Dinner on the table by 5:30pm works best.
If I do not explain proper behavior to my children, how can I expect them to behave properly.
The only way to really get your kids to listen, is to get down and look them in the eye.
20 minutes of joining in the fun can satisfy them for most of the day.
It doesn't matter what others think, what is most important is what we value as a familyand creating our own family container.
I can let go.
The best way for positive things to come into being quickly, is to let go.
What makes us complete is accepting all of our nature. As a mother we must also enjoy and be open to our sexuality. The two are not mutually exclusive.
Open and Receive.

May I continue to wake up every morning, striving to be better. Open and expanding like a flower.

Monday, May 9, 2011

The best you can do.

We all strive for perfection. Okay well at least most of the people I know. And the majority of us beat ourselves up for not achieving this so called perfection. I know. I have lived my life trying to be some kind of perfect I can't even describe. It is wonderful to want to be our best selves. But life is certainly a workout. Every day we wake up and have a chance to start again. Isn't that beautiful? No matter how hard your day may be, you have the chance to go to sleep and wake up and try again.
My life may be intense, but I don't wake up feeling like something is missing. Bedtime tends to be difficult. I want the boys in bed by 8pm, because at 8:30pm I turn into a pumpkin. Really. Or maybe just a really cranky Mommy. And each day I try again. It kills me that bedtime is not peaceful. But I am working on it. Last year my son's teacher gave me some wonderful advice, "you can only do the best you can do." Stop judging. Just do. All I can do is set the intention and do my best. Maybe the outcome does not fit into my picture or someone else's. There is always an opportunity to learn and we have the freedom to choose to work towards being better.  And even more importantly to let go of our illusion of perfection and just do the best you can.
I am learning how important it is to take risks, especially as a parent. I need to risk my children being angry with me. I need to speak my truth and set boundaries, so they will do the same.
In terms of taking risks, children really need room to explore. Waldorf Education teaches young children to use needles to sew and knives to carve. They light matches. Inuits give small children knives. As fearful as I may be I have tried to explore expanding our safety boundaries in order to teach my children responsibility.
I thought this talk by Gever Tulley from TED was really interesting...Playing with controlled fire, helping you do the best you can do!

Sunday, May 1, 2011

Calm amid the Chaos

This past week was especially challenging. Maybe it was Mercury Retrograde coming to an end. Maybe it is just the universe, but on any levels it was complex and at times frightening. Personally we had communication failure, and some health scares. Meanwhile tornadoes ripped across the earth. At the same time we (my family) had synchronises that were mind blowing. Which means that at the same time that things were whipping out of control they were safely circling in. With children, the best gift you can give them is a sense of safety. The same goes for ourselves. As much as we may not ant to admit it, there will be a time for pain, challenge, frustration, but if we can greet these difficulties with anticipation of learning they may be a bit easier for us to handle. For in the end our strength of character is in how we handle the most painful of circumstances.

Other things I am thinking about today...
My favorite astrology website -
My favorite bug repellent of the moment - Geranium Oil. Thanks to a friend's suggestion, I mix this oil with an unscented lotion and apply liberally. It works and smells good!